More stress and sadness…

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Dad was re-admitted back into hospital yesterday afternoon. My husband and I are making the two hour trek there this morning.

I do not think Dad will be with us much longer. It’s hard to contemplate what that will be like.

I’m supposed to go the uni to meet with my supervisors tomorrow. I don’t know if I will make it there… it will look bad if I cancel the meeting, but then, so be it. I can’t be everywhere at once, and Dad is more important.

He is barely able to walk now, and is requiring oxygen to breath properly. He seems to be in denial about how sick he is. He seems to think he might ‘get better’ somehow?

I suppose I would be the same… I would want to hold onto hope.

My first PhD submission…

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Beautiful abstract painting found on Pinterest – sorry I haven’t included the name of the artist.

No, I’m not submitting this painting… I just included it because it’s beautiful. I’m submitting 2000 words of my own writing.

My writing is about diverse things… I know they are going to tell me that I have to find a way to tie all these things in together, I mean, that would be kind of obvious. That is what I would advise, if I was in their position, anyway.

I have written about my artistic process, by where I walk alone in nature and then go home and make some art. I believe that nature (or natural things) have some kind of mysterious power (magic ju-ju) that propels me to make my art. I can’t exactly write that, though, can I?

Magic Ju-Ju!! It’s not academic is it?

I just know that I like to make stuff…. and when I am alone in nature, the urge to make stuff is very strong indeed.

So I have written about deep ecology, bowerbirds and the aesthetic drive in non-human species, eco-feminism and it’s critique of the deep ecology movement, and the philosophical significance of walking …. from a french, post-modernist perspective (of course.)

Happily….

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My husband and I were very happily reunited (again) after my ordeal with bringing my Dad home from hospital. I meant to stay away for three nights, but I stayed for five, in the end.

Since we’ve been married for a while, Valentine’s day ceases to be any kind of issue for us…. we are very boring compared to young lovers!

So far for 2018, we have spent more time apart than we have together, between his work and my family issues. Luckily, we are both independent spirits…. although we miss each other every day.

Dad comes home from hospital…

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I haven’t been writing about my Dad on purpose… because it’s very upsetting. He comes home from hospital today.

Dad is like a shell of his former self. He is so frail. To be honest, I’m not sure how we are going to manage him….

I think he has some memory loss now, I don’t think he should be left alone. The problem is, I live two hours drive away. This week will be a difficult one, where a lot of decisions will need to get made. I’m not sure that my siblings and I are entirely united in this. It really is so sad.

Wonderful news…. research excitement!

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The artist that I was trying to get in contact with, Simone, has emailed me back! Originally, I used the wrong email address for her…. due to a silly typo, which I need to be more careful of.

Now it looks like she may answer questions about her art for me. This is very exciting, as I will have some original, unpublished material for my PhD research, which looks very good (I think).

It also seems that the essay I was reading may have published the incorrect title of one of Simone’s works. So interesting… it just goes to show that not everything that goes on to get published in esteemed art texts is correct!